ホテルのバーにて

先日ホテルのバーに入ろうとしてドレスコードで拒否されたのですが、何だか起こったことが衝撃的で、自分なりに消化をしようと思って考えてたんですが、まとまらないので散文調に書いてみます。

まず何よりも、身なりを拒否されると傷つく、のを知りませんでした。周りの目があって、気恥ずかしいし、いたたまれないのです。さらにそういう複雑な感情を、当事者にならないと想像すらもできなかった、という事実も衝撃的でしたし、今の自分の想像力の限界なのかと思いました。例えが適切かわからないけど、「痴漢」という概念を知っていても、「痴漢に遭う」当事者にならないと、それがどれくらい怖くて辛いことなのかわからない、というような話なのかもしれません。人間の想像力って、経験したことないことを想像できるのか、他者の感情の想像にまで及ぶものなのでしょうかね。

シンガポールに来て以来少し敏感になってるんだけど、格差が目に見えるくらいに存在しています。言うまでもないですが、ドレスコードでの分断は、社会階層の分断であり、すなわち経済力の分断に直結しています。そういう意味で、この国のドレスコードは、日本の中流の「マナー」によるドレスコードとは性質が異なる部分があるのだと思う。(日本のそれよりも強い)縄張り意識というか、社会階層意識に根ざしてる、というのが現段階での感想です。その一方で、平等とか公平みたいな概念と矛盾しないために、「マナー」みたいな建前を持ってきてうやむやにしてる感じがあって、少なからず気持ち悪さは感じます。

一方そんな内省をしてみても、自分は雇われ外国人なので、適当に服を買って入店拒否されたバーに入って、色のついたチャラくて甘い水でも飲みながら、空とプールを見ながら浮ついたことを言う自由度があるのです。そう思えること自体が圧倒的なアドバンテージで、その頭で考えられることもやはり一方的なものでしかないのだと思いますが、それでも足りない想像力で考えると、「他に選択肢がない状態で、身なりで差別される」のは、当人にはつらいことではないか、と想像しました。でもわかりません、もしかしたらつらくないのかもしれません。

じゃあどういう状態が理想なのか、あるいは、今よりも改善しているのかと考えても、およそ答えは見つからないのですが、ドレスコードがあるような店からは、ますます足が遠のいてしまいそうです。自分が誰かにつらい思いをさせている状態に与していると思う、その葛藤に耐えられなくなりそうだからです。

ホテルのバーに入れてもらえないと、こんなことをもやもやと考えるきっかけになります。僕には重すぎて消化できないので、みなさんも(男性なら)サンダルと短パンで、マリーナベイサンズの屋上のバーに行こうとしてみて、拒否されて、どう感じたか聞かせて欲しいと思います。

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